The Versatile Fashionista: Dressing for Dom/Sub Play

The key to sexy role-play, particularly with a Dom / Sub twist, is only limited by your imagination, of course, but the more you can help the imagination out with a few props or “costumes” the more satisfying the experience will be. Face it, most people’s ideas about what to wear for Dom / Sub playtime are based on two primary sources, one is mainstream media, such as television and movies, and the other is online porn sites. The problem with both of these is that they quickly become cliche and cliches don’t always spark the imagination nor lend themselves to creative scenarios. So let’s look at ways you can inject a bit of you and your play partner into the creative mix of your fashion choices for more pleasurable Dom / Sub times.

You can spend a lot of money on  Dom / Sub gear — you know the sort of thing, high boots, leather strapping, masks, and so forth. And if you’re seriously into the scene, you should have a set or three of high-quality “costumes” as part of your wardrobe such as the Latex Dominatrix Dress or the Sexy Police Officer. Stereo-typical or not, it’s expected and is comparable to your “Sunday best” attire (think suit and tie for men, semi-formal dress for women). However, just as you have club clothes and “kick around” casuals, you should have their equivalent in Dom / Sub wear just for variety.

In a separate article, we’ll cover what the “best dressed” Dom / Sub might be wearing, but for now let’s focus on the more casual garb. Fashion tips will vary depending on your particular choices of “scenes,” but generally you should concentrate on the “eye candy” appeal. If the scenarios you enjoy most are fairly standard, take a page from those media stereotypes but with a fetish twist.

While many peoples’ mental image of Dom / Sub role costumes are based on the Gor novels, the fantasy artwork of Boris Vallejo, or the Hercules/Xena television series, there are a number of options that are readily adaptable to dominance/submissive scenes. Just take a look at the numerous “pulp fiction” cover art sites available on the Internet. There you’ll see damsel in distress, bondage, tough guy/tough girl, and rough sex images that should give your imagination a real boost. For more ideas try Nina Hartley’s Guide to Erotic Bondage.

Women should visit their local thrift stores or vintage clothing outlets and buy some inexpensive full length or half-slips. Back in the day these used to be considered part of underwear, but they can also serve as a kind of tawdry “come get me” lingerie, especially when worn with nothing else. The thinner material the better for the see-thru look and you can snip one of the shoulder straps to add extra sexiness. If you can find really inexpensive slips, you won’t even mind so much if it becomes “torn and ripped” during Dom / Sub play.

For damsel in distress attire or perhaps that prim slinky look favored for bondage, there are any number of boutiques catering to the retro 1940s look. Fetish photographers particularly like the “gun moll” or “femme fatale” look for either dommes or switched subs. Many dominants of either gender enjoy their subs in pseudo-children’s togs (like halloween costumes for adults) or casual summery “throw aways” such as cut off jeans and open shirts or mid-drift blouses. Ready made scenarios come to mind such as the “rescued” castaway or the “kidnapped” beach goer, so summer casuals are an easy play time addition to your Dom / Sub wardrobe.

For fetishy doms, there’s always the universal appeal of leather: jackets, boots, pants, snug strapping and strap-on harnesses, and even fetish masks if that’s your particular tweak. One of the standard Dom / Sub practices is to act out the difference in perceived social class, so you can mix and match clothing to suit any number of “culture clashes,” such as button-down yuppie and goth-punker, girly-virgin and rough biker, drill sergeant and raw recruit, inexperienced nerd and bad boy/bad girl. Really, the contrasts are only limited by your imagination and that applies to play clothes as well. So go shopping with your Dom / Sub scenes in mind and let your sexy imagination lead the way. You’ll soon have a wardrobe with enough variety to pique the desire of whichever Dom/Domme or Sub you choose to play with.

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